Wednesday, September 17, 2014

I want to create something.
Of importance.
Of significance.
Of presence.
Of existence.

I need to write again.
To tell.
To show.
To reflect.
To mutter.

It's all haphazard in the brain. Unorganized. In shambles. With no road I can pave in between the clutter.

Even my post today has no definite form.

It's all too easy.
It's all too complicated.

I don't want to just delete things.
I want to have memorable moments.
And be able to relive them.

Basking in the spontaneity.
Being reeled in the sea of emotions.

Have I really forgotten how to feel?

I don't even want to look back at all the sentences I've just jotted down.

I don't want to look back and dwell in mistakes.

I want to feel. I want to feel being alive.

And just be myself. But alive.

Not dead. Motionless. Passionless.
But a passionate me is a highly strung persona.
Of the highest high and the lowest low.

I just hate being a girl, actually. Such emotions. Pfft.

I will not be a perfectionist procrastinator grammar feminazi and scour the post again for mistakes only to find ones and redo it all again and again till I lose heart to post.